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Need advice please by #36807 ..... Relationship Support Forum

Date:   9/16/2007 9:10:08 PM ( 14 years ago ago)
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Hi everyone,

I am in a situation and I don't know what to do. I have been dating a man for the last three months and we had our first dissagreement this weekend. He came to my house for dinner and we were both tired from work. I needed some help with something concerning dinner and he acted like he didn't want to help. I asked him to help and he said he was tired. I visibly got frustrated which then he offered to help. I probally should have handled that part a little differently because I told him to forget about in a "you put me off" way. At that point he knew he had upset me. I thought it was rude that he was so reluctant since I was fixing him dinner and all he had to do was help me for one minute and then he could sit on the couch. I had to run to the store and when I came back he had left! I tried calling him and texting him and he wouldn't answer his phone. After an hour, I decided I would go to his house and confront him. When I got there, I asked him why he left my house and he said because we were both in a bad mood and he just wanted to be alone. I told him that was fine but he should say something before he left and that it upset me. He said that that is just how he is and he has done it his whole life. I told him that I thought it was rude and maybe we shouldn't hang out any more and he asked me why that would make me not want to hang out any more. I told him that I didn't want to be friends with someone who behaves that way. At that point I left. The next morning I get a text telling me that I am not allowed to come by his house unless invited and that it was much more rude of me coming by uninvited than it was of him leaving without a word. Then he asked if we were still on good terms. I told him that I dissagreed and that I wasn't happy with him for acting like that and I wasn't sure if I wanted to continue the relationship or not. That was yesterday and I haven't spoke to him since. We usually text all day and talk once a day. My question is should I just let this relationship go? All my friends think I should. I have a history of being too nice and accepting behavior from men that most women wouldn't. I am a attractive and very responsible person. I think I am a good catch, yet I don't know how to handle men. I am proud of my self for standing up to him, yet I am starting to miss talking to him. I feel like if I let him get by with it, he will have no respect for me. I am trying to break my self of letting men walk over me.

A brief history about us, we are both 38 and have been aquainted since our twenties. We ran into each other early summer and started seeing each other. He is freshly divorced as of Febuary this year and is a little shaky about getting involved in a relationship. I have been divorced for 11 years. The newly divorced issue is probally a red light in its self. I appreciate what ever advice is given. Bless you all!

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