Re: Wow~ Here's someone who has actually gone through rape....please listen. by #58453 ..... Rape Survivors Support Forum
Date: 2/6/2008 4:05:16 PM ( 10 years ago ago)
Well, no.....I'd say that you definately didn't blow anything here in this case.
To me having someone say that "They know exactly how I feel" was like one of the most painful things I could hear. For her though.....you know her and she seems to be opening up more to you than you once anticipated, which is fantastic. Not all people are alike and this is what sets her apart from me. She is stronger than I was. Her family should be addressed somehow so that they can learn to communicate much better. Maybe the parents aren't happy together and that's why they are not getting along. Maybe there is a money issue that is too far common in households.
There is too much going on there in that particular household, she needs more from them. Later in the counceling sessions I would maybe ask how she felt about bringing in her Mom first and then her father, and then perhaps both. That is just what I would probably do, however you know a lot more about that area than I do. I don't think it would hurt. My mother cried for days when I told her about it and asked why I never told her (I know that this girl has told her family). In that particular moment of my life I was living in a trailer with my mom and her boyfriend whom I would have deep deadly nightmares about. So, my living condition was pretty bad. I didn't want to bother anyone.
So far I think you are doing just as you should. You are letting her lead her own sessions. They are infact about her and maybe the only way for her to completely open up is to let her lead. You are right on!!!! I think you are doing a great job.
Couselor's at hospitals are horrific. They are a here and now person and have many other people to tend to so their time is limited and most of the time ask the wrong questions, their personality comes off as hurry I need to be somewhere.
I really truly feel bad for people who go there for rape or other similar reasons. I know that's where they are suppose to go.....but I hope you know what I mean.
Glad to hear that things are coming together with her. I hope that you both get the sleep that you need to wash away some stress that you both carry.
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