I think that there is a clear signal in his own words/actions that he was using you and feeling guilty about it. This sort of off-on behavior is really acting out his guilt. You are nice and soft and sweet and help him in a lot of ways that he needs. But...he is pretty sure that he won't take this relationship any further, i.e. you give, he takes. That's all that he wants.
He should be eating red beans and rice, doing his laundry by hand, walking to work (or using public transportation) and generally 'living low', so that he can do special things for you once in awhile. He should be camping on your doorstep and trying desperately to be a necessary, vital part of your life. That's the gold standard!
[Even my cat knows enough to offer a fresh-caught mouse to his mate!]
I hope that God blesses you with a caring mate soon.
Blessings and peace,