You are so young, too young to be feeling the way you do. As you don't have money to get any help I would suggest locating a Naturapathic College in your area to see if they could offer you guidance/support/direction, also try finding a local alternative health clinic and see if someone there would be willing to help you. Don't be afraid to ask for help when you need it. We all need help from time to time. If someone was to walk up to my door right now and ask for help I would glady let them in.