how effective can that be? the massage was it one of those prostate massaging ones?
Guilt is the first thing you mentioned, which is magnifying your fear.
Deal with your guilt first. You pay for a third rate blowjob or you do not do it for whatever reason. Choose one and accept it so you do not waste precious life in guilt.
"Today,i was worried about contracting some STD and that has really been on my mind'
Are you equally worried that it is more likely she could contract something from you?
Are you worried that the condom barrier was not enough?
The fear you deal with by educating yourself on the risks of transmission and having sex encounters in the first place and the necessity of an encounter with someone where you need to wear a condom for a blowjob