never fear. the only constant is change. you are not going to remain this way, no matter what. and if you think "the change" is a pink slip from being a woman, talk to one who has been there a while.
i wish i could help you feel better. what i do know is that you can feel about it any way you like. i also know that how you think will translate into how you are. youre more in control than you think. do what you know to do and do right by yourself. youre only halfway through here.