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assaulted - defer grad school?
 
blushampoo Views: 1,753
Published: 17 y
 

assaulted - defer grad school?


Need some advice here from people who have gone through similar experiences. Post is a little long so bear with me...

Since graduating college last year, I have been living with my boyfriend in "city X". I had planned to attend law school this fall in city X with almost full scholarship. Boyfriend is planning to attend law school school in a different city, about 2-3 hrs away.

Everything was fine until about 3 weeks ago, when I was abducted and sexually assaulted. Boyfriend has been great and supportive, but now I have no idea what to do about law school. I never particularly loved city X - I have no friends here other than my boyfriend and my parents live on the other side of the country. After the rape I want to stay here even less. In addition, I no longer feel emotionally ready to attend law school. It will be end of September before I find out if the attack left me with an STI, including HIV. I have always worried about my health and practiced safer sex, and I fear that these worries will detract from my first semester of law school.

No doubt if I explain my situation to the administrators at my law school they will allow me to defer, or they would let me out of my scholarship contract and I could reapply to other law schools. The only problem is my parents. In order to protect them, I did not tell them about the assault. However, when I tried to talk to them about not attending law school in the fall they got really upset. They have never been the type of parents to push me academically and it was 100% my decision to attend law school. I think they suspect that I want to reapply in order to attend law school in the same city as my boyfriend, and they disapprove of me basing my career decisions around a man. Also, my younger sister will be starting school as a college freshman just outside of city X in the fall. She is not too excited about leaving my parents and all her high school friends, so my parents probably hoped I would be a support for her. Ultimately, since my parents aren't paying anything toward my law school it is not their decision, but we have always had a great relationship that I don't want to jeopardize.

What do I do??? Do I tough it out and attend law school in the fall - without any friends or support in city X to help me through? Do I defer from law school, without telling my parents the true reason? In that case, I would probably move with my boyfriend and get a job in the city where he will be attending law school. Only worry is what if we break up - and what will it do to my relationship with my parents?

Or do I tell my parents about the assault? Only problem is - it has been almost 4 weeks since the assualt now and I know they will be devastated I did not tell them earlier. That was mistake #1 on my part, I realize now. But I don't want them to have to worry about whether their daughter is now HIV+ - what I cannot stop worrying about myself - when I might turn out to be totally healthy.

Any advice is appreciated.
 

 
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