Sex Drive?

I am in my mid-30s and my husband is in his mid-40s. We have been together a total of 8 years, living together for 6 1/2 of them and married for a year and a half now. We have both remained in shape and taken care of ourselves throughout our relationship. He is loving, caring, romantic, attentive, and perfect in every way. Well, almost every way.

The first year we were together it was the standard loads of sex and it was initiated equally between us. After that first year it was still loads of sex but all of it was initiated by me. By the third year I stopped initiating it to see what would happen. Months went by with nothing. My husband and I discuss everything so I talked to him about it. Many more months went by with nothing and I finally jumped him. In the last five years we have had sex 4 times all initiated by me. He seemed to enjoy it but really it was more like he was doing his husbandly duty. When we had sex it would take a whopping total of 15 minutes from start to finish. Hardly worth the effort which is why I have given up.

It makes me wish that I had a different personal moral and ethical code. The last time I had sex with someone else in the room was over a year ago. Do I just need to accept that I will have a sexless marriage and deal with it? I have the kind of love and relationship with my husband that most people only dream of. If sex is not a part of it anymore I can deal with it if I must.

Would I be a bad person if I found myself a discreet playmate for the occasional roll in the hay? Would I even be able to change my personal moral and ethical code to do something as horrible as that? Our relationship has never had any secrets.

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