I know what you're talking about. Sometimes I don't feel like posting any fasting journals/comments because I'm afraid. You have some self hate issues and perhaps you should be easier on yourself. I am just telling you this because I know from experience. I'm 'fasting' for seven days. It's really a liquid diet of vegetables and one cup of tea every evening till next tuesday. I've already lost five pounds. You can do it. Just have more faith in yourself.