Enough with the name calling already! It certainly doesn't help.
You need to do what is right for you - you are at the perfect time to make a break for it. This man isn't going to leave his family, so you will always be #2. Don't do that to yourself.
Secondly, what stood out to me, was that he said he would always take care of you...tell me how can anyone take care of someone if they come #2 in their life?
I think you need to cut your losses, take some time and heal your heart and soul. There are plenty of un-attached men that are looking for women to look after and spoil. Soul mates are not hard to come by...if this guy truly was your soul mate than he wouldn't be married.
Do yourself a favour, and look after yourself and make yourself #1.