Yes, you are at the cross roads. He really seems to want the two women, and won't divorce, so what can he offer to you ? to be in the shadow all your life and been waiting for him when he likes to have some fun out of his marriage ? and how long can you hold this if you feel so bad to be the second ?
You love him, he seems to want to keep you into his life, so be friends and find yourself another man who will give you all his time and love.