I just want to make a point here.. I have no intention.. nor have I ever of actually taking this woman up on her offer. You say that "If you want to screw your wife's friend then the problem is YOU" I never had even thought about that let alone wanted to do it. Im pretty sure I made it clear in my first post that I wanted nothing of the sort. This is what also worries me in that I can ask for advice, but it seems some people will always take the side of the woman and that it is the guys fault when there is infedelity. I'll say it again I LOVE MY WIFE AND WOULD NEVER CHEAT ON HER IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM. I completeley understand that whatever the benefit of doing what she (and she alone) has suggested would not even scratch the surface of what I would lose in my wife and children. I would never want to do anything to hurt my wife.
The other point you made which has been bugging me is that I should not wreck a perfectly good friendship. How is this woman a good friend to my wife if she can offer her self to me. Surley this isnt the sort of person my wife would want as a true friend anyway. I know I wouldnt want a mate who would try to pick my wife up - would you?