I thought it was interesting that you said that she was your "ideal" because our ideal is usually not much at all about the other person but everything about our deepest feelings and wishes about how we would like to live our lives. I might therefore interpret your dream to be not much about the woman that you are interested in but more about how you may or may not be living the life that you really want. Have you successfully moved beyond your past? Are you truly doing what you want to in life?
You indicate that your home is messy....symbolic? Perhaps things in the present situation are not quite as you would wish them to be. Embarrassment at her seeing this part of you.
Also the stones in the bathwater. Yes, you have released old emotional stuff from the past, but NOT into the toilet and flushed it away, but are letting it float around you and you are continuing to interact with it (ie. picking it up in your hand).