Please dont be discouraged by things in the past. On any given day you can change the rest of your life. It is great that you have started the fast again today. This forum is a wonderful support system, I just found it 5 days ago and have found it amazingly helpful and a source of inspiration. It is great to know that while I am here in New York doing the Master-Cleanse there are people all over the on the same journey.
I am on day 10 today and had planned to stop at 10 but I am feeling so good, physically and emotionally that I am going to continue. I usually find the first few days to be the hardest.
A lot of suppressed emotions and fears can come up when you cleanse, but that is a part of healing.
Today is a new day........make the most of it.
Many blessings to you .......