Kevin, and others who might feel anxious and confused.
A good use of your time for a weekend, or a few evenings, (or many!) is to search the R messages in the Ask Andreas Forum -- much of what people are saying here might seem like it's overwhelming...but if you read Andreas' posts on terrain, protein, the function of yeast and other 'critters', you will have a good basis from which to hear others. And you will dispel much of this fear that seems to engulf you.
It's GOOD reading...Or you can check the R posts on Ask Curezone...and on Ask Moreless, for some rather radical and simple ideas on sorting out 'terrain'.
read, is my suggestion.Read and do very simple things. Good water, sole, and good fresh food...deep breathing through the nose. Slowing down. Appreciating good health rather that fixating on the bad.
for example, you can walk, right? Some cannot. The man I live with uses up enormous energy to walk...it is very hard, but he is an artist, changing peoples' lives at the heart level, and he prays and meditates for all others' benefits. He walks slower, and he lives!
The main thing is to connect to your own trust of yourself. One way to begin,
is to read more in order to discover what you are inwardly asking,
and then weigh your own intuitive sense of what you hear.