I am concerned about your mention of eating soy products, as these are damaging to health (except miso) and they might be contributing to your iron problem, although some might think they would help. Soy contains many antinutrients, one of them being phytates which block mineral absorption, causing zinc, iron, and calcium deficiencies. I posted a link to an article below for your perusal.
Off the top of my head, I would recommend that you take a broad digestive enzyme supplement with each meal, to help ensure that what you do eat is digested. Not forever, but for a few months at least. I know this works with proteins, I am thinking it might have a good overall impact on your health.