Thanks! I wish i had known that! I've always wanted to do an enema but I haven't found any kits where i live. Next time i'm out in the city i will look up where to get a kit.
I'm definitely a person that keeps my emotions to myself. The only time i feel i can be open with others is online when we don't know each other or when I know my issues won't bother then. I grew up in a really bad household. As the youngest in a very poor family I had to do without, which meant, no food, no clean clothes, no school supplies, it was hard but I couldn't ask my parents for anything because they'd get mad at me and I remember the teachers yelling at me for coming to school in rags. So when bad things would happen to me, i didn't tell anyone, i just tried to pretend that it wasn't happening. I think that's a major reason why I keep everything bottled up. I don't want to hurt anyone and I don't want to be a bother so i try to fight my issues on my own. That sounds pretty bad but i think i've managed well over the years despite the weight and alcoholism. I guess I'm greatful that I never turned to harder drugs and that I feel i can still get out of this. I always try to remember that people have it worse somewhere else and that the only way to make the world better is to better myself and those around me.