"Trusting God is a full 1/6th and if you are not satisfied with your faith in God as you choose to believe ---then your brain will destroy your health and life out of misery and despair."
That one God is the direct source the others five or six are just indirect from the store and toxic/growing rot/dying so for life we use from that preserve. And what about when all the input is gone or God is dead - all the angry hungry frustrated spirit looking back onto history for food for life, nice store?
That is very strange it is like self killing as you said it. Living with God is only the life clean enough for living one's span.
That direct is one it is that Love first given to be born.
thank you holy man!