Re: How smelling bad can get you arrested by the police. TRUE STORY
SoulKing, I completely understand the reluctance to take action against anyone in authority that has behaved badly, particularly if the person(s) in question actually has the power to inflict harm. I was terribly abused by a State Trooper, in the lobby of the barracks in full view of other Troopers and on-camera. I was there to report several incidents of vehicular tampering (that might have ended very badly for me) and months of stalking by the same individual. I did not take action. Oddly, a couple of months after the incident in the lobby, I received a phone call from Interal Affairs asking me if that Trooper had been abusive, and I told them that he had, indeed. It turned out that other people had experienced the same treatment and had filed a formal complaint. I have no idea what became of the Trooper, but I didn't take action because I was already being terrorized by someone who did not have the power of Law Enforcement to use, and I sure as hell didn't want someone who DID have that power to cause even more trouble for me.
For you, there are several issues going on, here. First, your self-confidence and self-esteem are in the ditch, and it's going to take some work on your part to rebuild both of those things. Next, you have had a traumatic experience that you're trying to process. Then, you have a physical issue that is causing extreme anxiety for you.
There have been some phenomenal responses to your angst, and it might be a good idea to just start with one step. Journal everything that you consume - beverages, foods, supplements, etc.........everything. Make a chart that will allow for the date, time, item consumed, and amount. That would be the first step in addressing your physical/medical issue. Also, it might be a good idea to speak to a medical doctor - it may be something that can be identified and managed - not using medications, I don't believe, but if you can at least put a name to it, you can begin managing it.
Meditation and doing something that keeps you in "the now" will help with the anxiety. There are so many techniques to calming the mind that I cannot list them all in this response. EFT - tapping is an EXCELLENT option and is not (is not) some mysterious and complicated technique. It only involves crossing one's arms and tapping rhythmically upon either the shoulder or upper thigh, alternating between left and right. The success of this technique is so simple - it causes both hemispheres of the brain to engage, thus stopping the chatter in the mind.
When I mentioned making the U-turn out of fear, I wasn't trying to minimize your experience or dismiss the behavior of the police. My intent was to suggest that the likelihood of being stalked by a serial killer is pretty slim and, if you are in true danger, there might have been other options that wouldn't have drawn attention to yourself. I'm not blaming you - please, try to understand this. But, what I am trying to point out is a level of fear/anxiety that is causing problems. Not a big deal - it's something that can easily be managed, but it's very important to recognize it, call it what it is, and attend to it. Anxiety actually has a "purpose" in human behavior and physiology, but the contemporary times have created a huge confusion in our fight-or-flight responses. That's what anxiety was "meant" for: fight or flight in response to an actual, physical threat.
So, again.........I wish you the very best in your journey.