Re: thank you all...

Dear Marte,

Let me just say before I go spewing a bunch of advice that I have had problems similar to yours. And because of those problems, I got a gift of learning about them and getting some pretty good advice myself that has worked for me.

I learned that a lot of this problem has to do with the issue of control. I was the type of person that had to have a lot of control over my life. It was very hard for me to even think of giving up this control. A lot of my eating habits were like an addiction. Or perhaps an obsession. Either with food, or with depriving myself of food.

The hardest thing for me to do was to realize that my "willpower" wasn't enough to change things. I would constantly beat myself up for not being "strong" enough, or being what I perceived as weak.

The I discovered what surrender was all about. It seemed very counter intuitive to me. But I had no other options. It seemed like the exact thing I should NOT be doing, but it was the thing that worked for me. I finally one day, just said " I give up" and knew that I couldn't do any more. I started praying like a madwoman. I prayed all the time, which was funny because I didn't even think it would work. Anyway, I offered up all my problems to the universe (or God, or whatever). It was so hard to do.

But little by little, and it was so very hard, I got better, and I started being able to improve my health. Those awful compulsions started to let go.

I still struggle to this day, but that is what has helped me, and as time passed, I started being able to take better care of myself, and new ideas about health found me - I didn't really find them.

My dad always told me that the Japanese character for "crisis" was actually two symbols together. The first is a symbol representing great danger. The second is one that represents great opportunity. That has always stuck with me. Out of the worst time of my life, came the greatest opportunity and now I am better than even before I ever had these problems.

I will pray for you and wish you all the support in the world.

Ali

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