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Now Almost Day Four
powerray Views: 816
Published: 11 years ago

Now Almost Day Four

I'm going to bed. Feel sick, can still not really move at normal speeds, feel very miserable, but have received support here and am keeping the fast. Thanks, everyone. Ten days is so long but I so need it. I am just, the misery is really getting me down (ha) . I need some distraction. I have not really located anything that really engages me in my whole environment or life. Food was substituting for every kind of engagement. OK, I can go to an early morning AA meeting tomorrow. I felt that would make some difference. I guess I need to reach out to others to get help with distraction/engagement. I am ... a LITTLE able to pay attention to others and help them and be absorbed in attending to them for a little while, but... it just seems like it only lasts so long. I despair, knowing the conversation will eventually be over and I will be left with myself again. Sorry to be heavy. I think all this emotional condition is a part of my detox. i only pray I can withstand the emotional pain of it. I do feel a BIT more detoxed/better. Oh please -- this can't last forever, right??? Powerray

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