we were dating, had no problems with the kissing or anything, sure i was paranoid, especially when we did without any balm on and sober, but i forced myself to do it, kind of like public speaking is you have anxiety about that. i dont think she ever noticed, and the funniest thing is that although i realized im not really into her it took away all fear about approaching other girls. it is ridiculous to think i waited 4 years because of the psychological impact this condition has. i now have no fear whatsoever and actually did pursue others while away without thinking about my lips. do not let it affect this aspect of your life, its not worth it, i lost 4 years.