Sparque, please correct me if I missed it somewhere in this thread, but what are you doing, personally, to protect your Self? Who are you talking to outside of your work environment to process all of this thooroughly intense and draining negativity? What tools are you using to help Sparque heal and stay focused? I see a lot of what happened at work, some of the details with regard to clients, and relief that one of your clients caught you in a moment of human reaction, but I haven't seen a word (unless I've missed it) about Sparque working on Sparque's well-being with Sparque's individual therapist. If you do have a therapist that you are regularly working with, WONDERFUL!!!!! If you have not found one, I would gently urge you to get it done, yesterday, or you will definitely become jaded, burned-out, desensitized, numb, ambivalent, and apathetic to the whole focus of what you're trying to accomplish with these kids. The average time that a well-meaning counselor spends in a juvenile group home environment is about 18-24 months - long enough to write their Doctorate thesis, and then they bug out into private practice.
Again, with regard to discolsure to juveniles involved in involuntary treatment, PLEASE, use caution with the disclosure!!! All it takes is for one child to seek attention and create drama and tell an administrator that you told them a list of events in your own life that made them "feel uncomfortable." Don't fool yourself into believing that one of these children wouldn't do this if it suited their needs because it HAS happened and it DOES happen. Please, please, please, use caution - you're new to this whole mess (and, I call it a mess because it IS) of juvenile group home environments and you cannot imagine the lengths that some of these troubled, disturbed, and damaged children will go to in order to soothe their own egos and the even GREATER lengths that some of the staff will go to in order to assert and maintain their status. My mother worked in an adult group home environment for many, many years and some of the behaviors that these people exhibited (this included the administrators!) was just incredible. Talk about NPD! LMAO!!!!!!! These are the perfect environments for an NPD to feed their control monkeys!