Re: His Mother...
I have the same problem. Unless you can talk to him and get him to admit to his mother that you two are back together and that you've done so much for him in the past...and maybe even admit that he's hurt you a lot...I don't know what else would initiate a reconciliation.
Of course then she might argue that...if you've both hurt eachother, why waste your time with eachother? Valid argument too. But if you love eachother, there has to be something there. I've read your other posts and you sound like you're in eachothers blood. There has to be something there if you're back together again...especially if he chased after you when you moved out of state.
Then again, maybe you're just taking personal comfort in the safe familiarity of eachother whether its good or bad...it's safe.
His mother sounds like she is always going to hold this against you and she will always have a grudge against you as long as you treat her son better than she does because she's too selfish to do so. It almost sounds like she prefers his sister becasue he might have been more of an accident than she may have been, if even. So of course he's going to latch on and constantly seek her approval or show her that he needs her.