If I could I would keep you company...you a very sweet soul.
What about church programs?
Life can seem very cruel sometimes and it is difficult to understand why we are choosen to carry certain burdens in this life. I'm sorry that your burden is so great and others have hurt you, it appears to be common these days.
Be strong and know that God loves you, but there is little that he can do to help us here on earth. While on earth we must look to humanity for support, please keep looking and I'm certain that you will find what you need.