hello everyone, I hope someone will give me wise advice.
my sister is 22 and basically the matter is that she is jealous of my 3 y o daughter...she is subconscious about that and would not admit it but it is quite obvious from her behavior.
Little background info: I am 26, she is 22. She still studies to get a degree & lives with my parents in another town 500 miles away from here. They come to visit for a weekend every other 2 weeks or so.
My father literally runs at her heels and she is quite pampered at home. She relies on my parents even for very basic chores and tasks, and she also is quite mean to them, but this is not my business. I already tried to speak of this matter both toher and to my parents for a couple times, but they won't admit there is a problem and I do not see any reason to insist.
My problem is that every time that their attention is drawn by my daughter (or my family in general) she plays drama. Obviously this happens in a subtle way , i.e. she makes them feel guilty telling them she was afraid to seep alone, or that she had a bad stomach flu while they were away, etc etc.
To give an example, when my daughter accidentally broke her leg at just 7 months ( a dreadful experience for the whole family), I was alone and with no help and even my hsb was in another country for work issues. my parents never came to visit or help me b/c my daughter told her that she might have cancer. She had blood tests and begged my mother to stay as close to her as possible.
Recently, when my parents invited the 3 of us to spend 1 week in a home of theirs, in the mountains ( we live in a big polluted city 350 days a year), she refused to come with us. After 48 hours though, she called my father in tears and begged him to drive 200 miles to their home and take her back ( will she ever get a train/bus on her own I wonder ?) to join the rest of the family b/c she was about to have a difficult school test and needed their support. She then spoiled the vacation by hanging around, complaining that she could not study b/c of my 3 y o which was too noisy, and finally caused a major argument with my husband, thus my parents were forced to leave with her leaving the 3 of us to spend the rest of the week alone ( and in peace, I might add) .
The more my daughter grows up and the worse the situation gets.
I also do not like the way she talks to my daughter, soothing voice with sudden sharp
and rough words, sort of Jekyll/Hyde behavior.
I don't know what to do anymore, I feel sick of her behavior and also of my parents' compliance / denial. What should I do?
thanks i.a. for reading and answering