Yo dude, Chuck T here...
I know where you're comin from man, I've only had this shit for a month and I understand completely. It puts you in a pretty shitty mindset but the key is acceptance and you need to stay strong. Maybe God gave you this for a reason, look at it that way.
Dude, I'm eighteen years old and like I said I only got this a month ago. Fortunately I spent the majority of my teen life without this condition, and I established myself as very confident and social person. I had my own apartment at age seventeen, a car, a good job, with plans on joining the army. Last summer was amazing and I never had trouble with girls, in fact now that I look back at myself I see a completely different person. Anyway dude I got locked up for nine months in early august 2006 and i just got out last month. Two weeks before I got out my upper middle lip became affected. Fuck. Right before I was discharged dude, with my entire social life waiting for me and a beautiful girlfriend. I stayed in hiding for about a week, chilled with my son, and then I realized that my BOTTOM lip was also becoming affected. It has spread a little, and I know exactly what you mean when you say you avoid bright lights and shit. It's something you have to manage dude, you have to assume there is no cure to it. I don't have the same experience as many people in here, the whole "4 day cycle" thing. What I do is use Burt's Beeswax lip balm, it slightly conceals the condition but I constantly have to worry about white shit to pop up out of nowhere, so visiting the bathroom has recently been a big part of my social situations. I'm not gonna lie dude, it is hard and I have to say most of the time it's on my mind when I'm with my bros, but for the most part it's something you just got to manage and say fuck it. God gave me this, not to punish me, but to offer me an opportunity to grow. You know?
Dude, we can always find shit to stress about. We just got to accept this shit. I don't think anyone holds your negativity against you because I'm sure everyone on this forum has felt that way. Fuck, I've only had this for a month. A month dude. A month ago I was bitching and whining about it well, guess what, I have it now and I'm not gonna let it fuck up my life. I got too much, I got a son to take care of, I have great friends, just count your blessings and be thankful for everything you have. If you don't agree with my philosophy, then do something else with this. Out of every negative comes a positive, only if you let yourself see the positive.
Just manage it, I have yet to see someone who has cured this. I do know that CheilitisFighter has been fairly successful with vitamin C cream and collagen tablets, try that. But like I said man, assume that there is no cure. You're only setting yourself up for dissapointment. Accept that you have this, and for fuck's sake, enjoy this life the best you can! We're all going through the same shit.
And about you wrapping your car around a tree, isn't that kind of extreme? Think about it man, this really isn't that bad. It just sucks if you let yourself become a slave to it.
take care and don't do nothin stupid goddammit,
peace -Chuck T