joshua45
Diane: you ask an impossible question to answer (ie)
How often do you think is a normal amount of time to spend with family?
The problem is: what is 'normal' for one person will be different for someone else. The second problem is that what YOU CONSIDED NORMAL will CHANGE OVER TIME. (ie) for today, once a month is MORE then enough ( I am the same way).. XYZ number of years from now, what YOU CONSIDER NORMAL will change.
In other words: Depending on your MEANING SYSTEM and the things you learned growing up.. your need for 'family contact' will be very much different from someone else with a 'different' meaning system and the way they were raised to value, etc.
I would suggest that you consider the following: Since this involves both your parents as well as your inlaws.. that you and your spouse 'talk about what is normal and right for the both of you.. and establish for yourselves, what you both consider 'REASONABLE" and CONSIDERATE.. for yourselves AND your parents(his and yours). And then, APPLY THAT STANDARD (once a week, once every couple weeks or whatever. Regardless of what you both decide.... Keep it 'fair' or applicable to BOTH SETSD OF PARENTS.
Your situation with 'living in the same building' makes it difficult and compounds the existing situation.. hense.. simply consider: Do We Need To Be LIving in the same building as our parents? All that I am saying is just an appreciation for your situation.... Hense, you and your spouse may have to consider the ramifications all the way around.