onthejourney
Tee,
I hear you. It will not be easy to leave your little one but there are ways you can make sure that you are still doing what is best for you and baby - breastfeeding and make the separation go as smooth as possible. This is something doable. Five hours is not that long away from baby although you will have to leave some breastmilk in case baby wants it. Some babies take very little milk while mom is away and actually learn to wait but will want to make up for it when mom is at home. As long as you are letting the baby nurse whenever he wants while you are home, you should have no problems. This also means giving baby access to the breast at night. Whatever meets the baby's need to nurse at night and your sleeping need is the best way to go. Many moms find co-sleeping is the easiest way. Baby is happy and mom doesn't lose any sleep. Working moms especially enjoy the physical closeness (so does baby since the must be separated during the day.
I also would not suggest introducing the bottle until a day or two before returning. Warning, baby may not take it from you. You may have to ask someone else to do it. Use a slow flow nipple and prop baby up so milk is not just rolling in their mouth. It makes it more similar to the breast this way.
I also suggest that you talk to your employer about pumping during your break and maybe even consider a better (double) elctric pump. You will get more milk more quickly and it will drain breast more thoroughly. Most hand pumps are only good for the mom who wants to leave the baby on the rare occasion. Or can the sitter bring the baby to you at your break?
If you nurse right before you leave, the baby eaither comes to you or has a little pumped milk while you are away and then you nurse right when you get home. He or she will get used to this and your body will too.
Also, try to find your local La Leche League. They are a great resource for breastfeeding moms. Lots of moms have been sucessful in working and breastfeeding. Most of your success depends on how badly you want to do it. Inform yourself and then go for it.
Your baby is lucky that you want to give him the best. Best of Luck.