Relationship problems arise when we don't see the larger picture of things. Taking a snapshot out of life doesn't tell you anything about what brought about that moment, and it doesn't tell anything about what followed. Likewise, your time with your mother in this life doesn't make much sense to you if you don't include in the equation what happened between the two of you before this life. Just because you only see the snapshot doesn't mean that is all the reality there is. If you saw your life with her in a previous timeline, you would suddenly understand why is so criticial of you. She is still defending herself out of fear of being abused by you (phsyically and emotionally)again, as it happened before. She suffered greatly at your hands, and although she is not consciously aware of it, she tries to keep you at bay by putting you down. The trauma of abuse is still with her and she is still in the reacting mode. You needed to come into her life again to give herself the opporunity to forgive you for what you did. It has been a long road for her, and she still is in pain. The criticism she has for you, is not directed at you. It is meant for herself. She hates herself for not forgiving you and lashes out at you, the mirror of herself. The things she doesn't like in you are the very things she dislikes in herself or deprives herself of. When she looks down upon you, she actually means herself. You are not responsible for the way she is towards you, that is her own making. But you are responsible for the agony you feel when she is like that. It is the old guilt and shame of having profoundly hurt her in previous lives that comes to the surface when she attacks you. If you feel victimized by her, that is your own making. I suggest you read Freedom from Judgment, and if needbe you can contact me for a session in Sacred Santemony to help clear the pain in your heart (see my website). Certain parts of the past "return" to us at certain times. By no means are they setbacks, just opportunities to open up some new doors that were formely closed. You have done a lot of work on yourself, and none was wasted. Being harsh on yourself, reflects the amount of guilt. But this can be cleared quickly. Trust your feelings of instinct. With every locked door there is another one that opens.