After I blew up at everyone I felt a little better. Although it will do no good I am sure. I think I was pms'ing too. So it did not take much to let'em have it.
You are right though, many people rely on me. And when I complain or feel ill I just get blank looks. And no one, I mean no one helps me in any way at all. Well, my hubby does, but no one else. And the minute I even bring up anything healthy related they stare at me and then change the subject. I try to understand , I know it sounds outrageous, really I do. But I feel so beaten down sometimes and I really struggled and when you get no support or encouragement. They act totally disinterested and then proceed to tell me about another sick family member and she is in in need of help. And when I roll my eyes I get the third degree, I should be more senstive. Please, give me a break. I guess I am becoming selfish, because if I don't look out for me, they sure won't.
Another family member was going on and on about weight watchers and losing weight and how hard it is to not eat certain foods. Well I blew up about that too. They think they got it tough, try feeling like you will die and get no help not even from doctors. Try having to research your own illness while you cannot think or see straight.
I felt like a animal that had been hit by a car but was too weak to get out of the way of more cars. I felt like I was destined to die and suffer. I sometimes wonder why I am being punished and why no one will rescue me. I am rambling I guess. But I sure do feel alone in a way that is horrible and woinder what I ever did to deserve this.
In any case thank you and others on this board for the much needed pick-me-ups. This board is the only place I can find people who understand.
I have been emotional lately even after the pms was finished. It has been a long journey and a tough one at that for all of us. I have learned alot about myself and much about how to take of myself. I have learned lessons about what i will NOT do once I am better, like worry and cater to everyone else.
I have been better lately and I know I hae find a way to get over it. Things are getting better for me and just have to keep reminding myself how far I have come.
Well are all on a quest for answers about our health. But now that I know about the scope of your dilemna I will keep an eye out as I research for anything pertinent.
Thanks for the support.