It's just a cold. I have no fear of stuff like that really. Heck I don't really even fear the flu, although maybe slightly I suppose. These acute illnesses are not even worth mentioning compared to what I've been through in my life with health issues. It's the chronic stuff that's hard and then of course when you get a cold or something on top of everything else, it just drains you a little more than usual but it leaves as fast as it comes too. I've been very ill most of my life, over 32 years now. It's definitely been a learning process in learning to trust the Lord in all things even when all understanding goes out the window. But he's good no matter what. That's what I've learned. And so I've gotten better with the fear. And I've learned to find joy despite suffering. And the love of the world has lost much of it's grip on me.

Our stories are not all the same, that's for sure. I love that video I posted the other day where the man talked about what was wrong with socialism. He said some have this desire to level the playing field, but in this world, it wasn't meant to be that way. God doesn't bless everyone with riches, and he doesn't bless everyone with health, some are beautiful, some are not, some live to ripe old ages, some die super young, some are hugely talented, some are not, some are born in freer countries, some are not, some are good with grammar, some are not :), and on and on we could go in showing how the playing field is never going to be level here. But as that man said, we need to all be thankful for what we do have. But most importantly, we need to put our hope firmly in the gospel and all it's promises because no matter how blessed we are in this world, even if we live to a ripe old age filled with love and physical blessings, it still goes by so quickly. My grandmother is 95 and she constantly tells me her life has gone by so fast. I don't even want to live to be 95 to be honest. I long for eternal life with Jesus in a new glorified body, in the place he's preparing for us that will be so good we can't even imagine it, where there is no more envy, no more strife, no more fear, no more discontentment, no more suffering, no more pain, no more sin, but just unimaginable joy and love and awesomeness forever.

I used to be really sad over the things I've missed in my life because of illness, but I'm learning to get over that too. Whatever I've missed here doesn't even matter in light of eternal life with Jesus. The hardest part is probably not being able to serve others in all the ways I would want to. That part does really hurt but that's all part of the non-level playing field in this world too. Some are the carers and some are the ones cared for. But I still find what I can do in service to others, even if it's not to my contentment, but I need to learn to be content even in that. God knows my desires and if he holds some of them from me, I fully believe he has a good reason for it.

Physical blessings in this world are wonderful, no doubt. But they are also fleeting.

Eph. 1
3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ...

2 Corinthians 4:16
16 So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day.