Fountain of Youth
It IS really hard to get motivated when you just feel exhausted all the time. Food and nutrition are really helpful to feeling better, but it might not be enough, especially since you have been overloaded with drugs the last couple years. I am wondering if you are open to trying some of the cleanses that are listed here on Curezone. The ones that would be especially helpful would be the colon, parasite, and liver flushes. Another thing that I think could help a lot is massage. It is said that muscle retains memory (much like the liver), and some people have very emotional reactions to these simple things. Once the body is cleared of some of the emotional baggage (stress included), the mind seems to follow a little more easily. Sometimes chiropractors seem to be able to release emotions from their patients as well.
I just have to tell you about a chiropractor I went to almost ten years ago that was very into the idea of releasing tension and emotions. He was just starting out, maybe doing the residency type of thing, when he worked with an older woman who got headaches/migranes all the time. He adjusted her neck, and she just started bawling. He freaked out thinking he hurt her really bad...started saying, "oh, did that hurt, are you okay?" She responded, "yeah, I'm fine... I don't know why I am crying... I just am suddenly very emotional, but I'm not sad. It's just like all these emotions are being released." After a couple more adjustments, most of her headaches disappeared... take from that what you will.
BTW, if you feel that some of the cleanses are just 'too weird' you could start slowly, doing the one that seems the most acceptable to you. The best order is the one above, but people have had successful results in many different ways. Respond if you need more information, or if you don't think this is the path that you feel comfortable taking.