Look at it this way: AF is a wake up call. Something in your life needed MAJOR change, on an emotional level.

Your friends sound like douche bags...and if they think that, they weren't true friends.

Don't be too hard on yourself, your moods are quite uncontrollable. Seriously...

It gets better. Have you tried accupuncture and Chinese herbs? They seem to be working for me...Hang in there and think positive. Whatever you say out loud your unconcious mind digests as truth. So whenever I think of it I say out loud, "I'm strong, I feel great, my body is healthy." I'm stil not out of the woods but i'm at least 50% better than when I was diagnosed back in May, so I'm in the right path.

Sorry. Couldn't agree more. I am still determined to get as good as I can get. It's been just over 2 years for me know and I still have set backs and still only achieved 50% RECOVERY. I will be very happy if I can reach the 70% level of healing. I have been in a very severe stage of AF, that had been building over the past 30 years. As, all, I too was a type A person and loved adventures of skiing, mountain climbing, kyaking, working as a secretary, dating, working out at the gym. Some people are just blessed with a healthy body to be able to do all these things, but with an unbalanced diet and later, stress of moving 12 times with my husbands job, age, surgeries and illnesses, no wonder.
Yes, it is very difficult to not be able to do even a few of the mild things we used to do and probably never will, so we don't put ourselves back into an adrenal crisis.

My aim is to at least be able to do some lap swimming and be able to walk one mile at a normal pace, without having to sit on the park bench every 400 feet.

YOu will get there too, in time. Time comes easily. Patience and persiverance are much harder to indure. But, it's one day at a time and that is all that I work on and make no long term plans or committments for this season of the AF.
Take care. Paulette

"heard i am not fun to have around anymore. totally agree because I am always serious, frequently in bad mood. I could not keep my last girlfriend (don't blame her i would leave myself if I could) in March. Saw her today in biker's pub with a friend of mine... pure coincidence that they met. but it sucks to see how everything fell apart. AF sucks."

I hear you. It's one thing for your friends to ditch you, but your gf or bf... that's tough. My boyfriend left me b/c of AF also. To be honest, I've wanted to leave myself, too. But that doesn't take the sting away when others do leave.