Whatever any of us does, we do because of the degree of our understanding. All our activity, all our interrelationships are thusly created and driven. May seem obvious but usually we dont really consider how directed we are, how controlled we are by our either indepth or our lack of understanding about life.
Fear doesnt leave us because we tell it or ask it, ignore or affectate it, or because we hope or think it should leave. Fighting it, seemingly conquering it, is also only temporary. It ceases because we discover a more accurate understanding into the situation. Be it mental suffering, confusion or physical confrontation, barring the situation changeing on its own, when the fuel of error and misscalculation are rectified, the dissonant emotion dissapears, evaporates. The snake is seen to be only a rope.
From the simple to the complex, this is the trial of life we all live every moment to some degree untill we understand enough, completly, clearly.
It is the same with suffering. We may attempt numerous ploys or tecniques to mitigate suffering but our success' will always be temporary untill we truly understand the root cause and then silently, quickly, suffering ceases.
Again from the simple experiences we all are haveing to the more complex grand life situations. We all are facing and learning thru these type of delimas and to the degree we are ready and willing our understanding is continually trued and we move on incrementally. (tho complete understanding is realized instantaneously, it is most often provoked, and formatted, by the stageular dynamic)
The root cause of suffering is missunderstanding, missinterpreting, the message of pain in a given moment.
If we act appropriately regarding pain (and often not reacting can be the appropriate measure), mentally and or physically, suffering lessens and ceases. Pain may still be evident but if the understanding is correct for the situation we wont actually suffer from the pain being experienced.
Its not so much what we do or not do, as much as it is, are we doing what we are doing, because it is right for the understanding we know at that one moment. Internal forthright honesty and strength are some of the first prerequisites needed in rediscovering the frequency of being which mutes circumstantial happiness and saddness, by revealing the actual unconditional, uncontrived, fullfillment, that is our living beingness.
The root of all conflict is not having enough wisdom.
At first we know suffering so we seek answers. Then the limits of discursive reflection empower us to expand our perception, and to find the unraveling of each predicament by the spontaneous action of insight.
Our suffering manifests to the degree we choose to ignore, to frustrate and delay the natural living process of insight generation.
Learning about and discovering the process of generating understanding, comensurate with our already made life choices, is where most of us are working.
In living our already decided choices to their fullest, we enable ourselves to learn whatever it is, which we have embraced correctly and incorrectly, and allows us to accept the changes, allows us to better know how to deal with things as they are, and so to progress into a continually changing, and also continualy more clear understanding of things.
Its hard work till its not, confused, "murky" and cloudy till its clear. The choice is always ours, to face where we find ourselves and to seek/allow the truth/awareness, w the same concern and choice of action we would choose if either:
1. We were relaxing on vacation
2. It is of great interest
3. Our hair is on fire
When the pressure becomes too much, relax with it and know that ability as the begining of knowing real freedom.