A horrible fight and some medical news
beautiful weekend crashes and burns.
Date: 5/31/2006 9:15:59 AM ( 14 y ) ... viewed 2294 times
Last I posted, I left the living room after being told by my future sister in law that the last name I'm taking (which is part of their hyphenated last name) is wrong and I shouldn't break up the name and like it's not mine to break up.
This girl is a freaking headcase. She came down over the weekend after I practically begged her to come take part in our festivities. Our best man was there, and all weekend she was talking behind his back about sleeping with him "just because" and to mess up his relationship with his girlfriend.
Holy crap. So after she said that stuff about the last name, I left, broke into tears as I finished posting, and went to bed. When my fiance came in I flipped out. I screamed at him, he screamed at me, I said I'm tired of begging your family for their name.
It turned into one of the most horrible fights on record - I mean REALLY bad. He ended up staying home from work yesterday, and I came home early.
We were both really hung over, I ate like crap all weekend, though I did run 8 miles over 2 days (well not really, but grilled meat and hamburger buns, not great, but lots of veggies and fruit too, also lots of beer). So yesterday we tried to regroup. And I got some medical news which has put me off kilter as well.
Our strategy for dealing with the sis before was to ignore anything mean she said, and kill her with kindness and compassion. I have showered her with affection, gifts, and many kindnesses. She at times reminds me of her old self, and at other times she is mean and vindictive and a total bitch. Not just to me, to her father, etc.
I had no idea how much it was affecting me to sort of eat crow, and take whatever she said, and try to let it roll off my back. When she said that stuff about me not taking their name, all the hurt and all the pain I've swallowed from her actions - well let's just say the dam burst. And I took it out not on her, I took it out on my love, my fiance. Very bad move. He also said some really nasty things to me that escalated the whole thing, so I'm not the only one in the wrong around here.
So the fiance and I have decided that when she says stuff from now on, be it rude or nasty, if I'm feeling that she's said something inappropriate, we've got a signal between the two of us, a non-verbal cue, that I need some backing. Then we will say, both of us, to her - what you just said/did there - that's not respectful.
I'm not going to take on a secondary role to her being mental right now. I will not. My priorities have to be me right now. Clearly, I was holding a lot of stuff in, and it's just not healthy.
So then my GYN called me yesterday to tell me I do have Polycystic ovarian syndrome, which results from out of balance hormones - a little too much testosterone. I don't have any symptoms except the fact that my periods are really irregular when I'm not on oral contraceptives. The good news - I know what's causing it, and this also means that my oral contraceptives are being prescribed for a medical condition, which means they should be covered by my insurance.
I don't have any of the other symptoms, hair growth, weight gain and stuff, thank goodness. The bad side is that it may be difficult for me to get pregnant.
Though I really think that what happened to my mom will happen to me - she had super irregular periods until she had a baby, then she normalled out completely. They didn't have the blood test they gave me back before my mom got pregnant, so I have no way of confirming this.
Anyway, I'm completely shaken. We had chinese food last night. We are wrecked, after having one of the most beautiful weekends ever. I'm a total mess. Last night I had a dream that my wedding was horrible - that I forgot to have my hair cut, that no one was around to help me, that a handful of people showed up, we performed the ceremony (though I can't remember my fiance being there), ate the food, then all the guests showed up hours later, hungry and bored.
Weddings. Family. All of it - i just want to run away with my fiance. When he and I are together, we're OK.
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