My boyfriend and I have a 30-year age difference. He's 57. We have an absolutley amazing sex life.
The problem (which it probably isn't) is that he doesn't ejaculate every time we have sex. He gives me multiple cllmaxs and I have a difficult time stopping them or holding them back because he gives me so much pleasure. And I can't seem to let go of the idea that if he was turned on, as turned on as I am, that he wouldn't be able to hold back either. Sometimes he cllmaxs daily; though most often, every 3 or 4 days.
It makes me feel insecure. Also, I feel a "pleasure inequality" because he gets less than I do eventhough he tells me that I give him so much pleasure. Am I crazy for equating the number of cllmaxs he has with the amount of pleasure he's receiving? He tells me that he's an old man and that it takes more energy for him an that he needs to conserve his energy. Things do change as a person ages right?
I should probably note too that he is very healthy. And that he doesn't have to take any kind of stimulant to get an erection.
Here's a thought. It takes me longer to ejaculate as I get older. Especially after I have recently ejaculing several times during the day or the day before. Sometimes there is not enough friction during penetration to stimulate me enough to ejaculate. The lack of friction is because my partner is very excited, which means she is very wet and not tight. Maybe your boyfriend needs more friction. Anyhow, I would not equate the number of orgasms you have with his. If he's okay with it, then you should be to and just enjoy it.
even I as a 23 year-old male have sometimes problem to ejaculate when I have sex with my gf. Most of the times it is when I use a condom or when I would be ready to ejaculate I hold back because I want my gf to come first cuz she needs longer than me so I hold back and after I have passed that peak where I would normally be about to ejaculate it takes me then a lot longer to ejaculate.
So I agree with the poster above, either it's a problem of friction or it's because he's holding back during intercourse.
Did anyone notice the comment earlier about the man being older? Hello!!! All men are not created equal. If he get an erection quickly then you ARE stimulating him and he IS turned on by you. Take it from a person with experience in this field, he is older. Don't worry about it, just have fun with him and get really turned on KNOWING that you are making him happy and I garantee you both will enjoy it, with no guilt.
Part of it is probably the fact that most 57 year olds aren't meant to keep on pluggin' this way, if you know what I mean. You're probably burning the old man out. Neurological manifestations commonly begin in the 50's, and matters like this are definitely part of that game. Guilt is the most common emotion involved with a failure to ejaculate, or so I have read.
I have had a sort of similar problem! (as the original post) I am the same age, if my maths is working, (27) but my boyfriend's age is very different to yours. I was with a guy for a couple of years who was 34, and he would 'hold back' on his cllmax often whilst I would just have multiple after multiple, every time we had sex, which was about 8 times a week, often more. (he did this purposefully, to conserve what traditional chinese medicine calls jing, but there are lots of diffferent names for it) This is a pretty high rate, I realise, so while I did worry about me having all the fun, I also thought it was ok, as I also noticed that the more he actually did ejaculate, his libido would be lower next time. (that sounds so awfully selfish, I'll apologise now) He would always assure me that despite not coming, he loved to pleasure me, loved to see me cllmax, and was having a great time etc, so I really didn't worry. I also thought 'he is a little bit older, of course he won't cllmax every single time'
Since we broke up (about when we realised that the great sex was actually all that we had in common) I now have a new boyfriend who is just 23 so he should be different right? I read and read and read about women who are frustrated with men who come too quickly, but I haven't ever met one... I always get the ones who take ages and ages... On top of that, I have a very high libido, and cllmax very easily. I never seem to meet the ones who can keep up with me! In answer to the original question, I would say, if he says he is happy, then he probably is. And, never underestimate how much men are turned on by turning YOU on. They love to see you turn into a helpless puddle of cllmaxic inebriation, all done by their big tough manly selves.
I say have fun with your man, and believe him when he says he is happy and loves you.
Part of it is probably the fact that most 57 year olds aren't meant to keep on pluggin' this way, if you know what I mean. You're probably burning the old man out. Neurological manifestations commonly begin in the 50's.................
This sounds like establishment viagra selling myths! More pidgeon holing demopraphics that the establishment uses to instill the need for their services or their drugs!
I am a 58 year old man and I too sometimes don't ejaculate.
As men get older they suffer with something called "Refraction Time" which jokingly is a corruption of the phrase "REady For ACTION" time.
Men vary just as women do. Some men are blessed with the ability to get it up and ejaculating almost by just thinking of sex. Others can get it up but dont cum. Others can't get it up as often. I fall into the middle. My lady says she enjoys it ust as much and infact (being very pragmatic) says sometimes "less mess to clean up" because when I do cum it is gush rather than a dribble :-)
If you really want him to come don't do it as often and stimulate him more with gentle massage and licks and kisses before he penetrates. Always worked for me in the past!!