My current boyfriend finds no pleasure whatsoever in slow sex. As soon as he's in, he just starts pumping away like a jackhammer. When I ask him to slow down, he does for about one minute (usually while pouting), then picks up speed again. He has no concept whatsoever of build-up and he's resistant to learning anything new.
Don't worry, I'm dumping him, but I'm just curious about this kind of man, since he's not the first to be so lame in bed: Why can't men like this experience any pleasure from something other than hard and fast?
He is in a hurry to get to the end of the trip instead of enjoying the trip itself. Why do some people go the interstate instead of the scenic route? He has probably always used hurried masturbation to get relief and is using that same timing now. Talk to him when you are not engaging in sex and explain to him.
Thats just satisfaction for him, he couldn't care less about you, if you want a boyfriend, find a real man, one that cares about you too, and take pride in yourself, don't let yourself be fodder. Jungle love gets boring after a while.
is your (ex)boyfriend circumcised? if so this may explain why he had to go fast and hard in order to enjoy sexual intercourse with you. because of the lack of foreskin the only erogeonous nerve endings on his penis will be in the glans (head) which means that unless it rubs against the inside of your vagina he will not experience any pleasure.
wheras a man with a foreskin has erogeonous nerve endings in the foreskin itself which rubs against the inside of the vagina so these men can go slower and softer and still feel intense sexual pleasure.
but if he is not circumcised then i guess he is just a crap lover lol
Newly married and no expert on lovemaking. But I do know it should be a mutual thing of listening to each other and giving to each other in sharing for the two.It sounds like yor guy is incapable of that and it appears he has low impluse control and in the final analysis just plain selfish.I have some girlfriends who prefer it fast and hard too and some like you and me who prefer it slow.It all should be worked out in a shared mutual giving.My hubby is huge, huge and ony some of him fits deep in me and only with much lube and him going so slow. Thank God he does not thrust fast and hard and is so lovingly understanding.Besides I prefer it slow anyway. You raised a excellent issue thanks. Love.
It does bother me that guys like it hard and fast, but I find now, that since I have found the one I love sex is slower and we both enjoy it a lot. Maybe it depends on all other kinds of chemistry, past boyfriends of mine didn't totally connect with me as a friend and companion, just a hot boyfirnd, but since I met Jack, it's been better. I feel like sex all the time, and I like to arouse him more than just before sex, like in the morning, it kind of creates build up during the day, he spends all day looking forward to what he knows is coming, so I think he likes it to last.
Everyone is different. As a guy, I like to start slow and then build up. At the end, right before and during orgasm the body goes on autopilot and I go fast and hard. My DW's favorite approach includes a fair amount of foreplay, leading to my manually stimulating her to the point that she is just starting to come, then she wants me to penetrate her and pump her like a jack hammer while I continue to manually stimulate her clitoris. When she wants me inside of her, she definitely wants it as hard and as fast as I possibly can. Of course I love it, but I would usually prefer to start slow then build up the rythmn. So it's not always a guy thing. Sometimes it's a gal thing as well.
I can tell you're a smart woman by dumping this lousy lay toot sweet. Listen, MOST guys don't know how to do it, that's a fact of life. Nobody ever really teaches guys how to slow-bang a woman into orgasm. You can blame it on the school system, or Bush, or the Iraqi conflict...but really, it comes down to "taking responsibility for your own lack of education". Whatever topic I don't know about, I go and find out. I make it my mission to be an expert in that field. Takes some effort. Takes some discipline. Most guys don't know where the clitoris is located, but I bet they know the entire statistical matchup between the Patriots vs. the Eagles. Go figure. Hang in there, I realize it's an uphill battle, but 25% of the guys out there know what to do. You've just got to wait your turn at bat.
Well hello! Let me try and give my input and see if this could be the answer you were looking for. As the 18 year old guy that I am, I used to be the same way.. For me.. It was inexperience and a bad teacher. I had to reteach myself differently. The main reason I did it was simple.. Whats the main thing we all have in common when it comes to cumming? Consistency. What better way/easier way to be consistent than to drill you? It's hard giving you what you want, and how you want it without any clues besides the movement of your body. Not all guys know the language of the female body. I guess I'm just lucky to have cracked it at such a young age even though it won't help me much. I don't want more than 5 sexual partners in my life time. That's just not who I am. Oh well :P. I know it's lame, but try talking to him about it.. Any real man is aiming to please his lady. Plus it's more fun to make your girlfriend cum because it's so much easier to make us guys cum :D it's like a game that I want to win multiple times before you even get the chance to touch me.