Do you have *any* idea how ITCHY it is to shave the female pubic area and have hair start growing back? Or how extremely sensitive that area is? Or what razor burn or stubble, let alone a nick or cut on such tender skin feels like? It is on a large order of magnitude more sensitive than your face.
In this female's opinion, it is very selfish of you to nag your wife into shaving there. While *some* women like the smoothness of a fresh shave (and some like the pain of piercing the labia and even the clitoris), many if not most others would gladly not have to go through the discomfort, risk of infection, and/or pain. If *SHE* wants to, then that is *HER* decision, and it should be made for *HER*. *SHE* is the one who has to deal with the burn and the stubble every minute of every day.
As far as looking feminine, how much more feminine could it be than to view a female as nature intended?!? And on the subject of shaving legs and armpits, well, can I hazard a guess that you probably haven't spent a lot of time in non-North American cultures?
Personally, my feelings of femininity certainly do not rely on removing pubic hair! I would hope that most women are much healthier emotionally than that.
I won't even go further into the pyschological ramifications of a hairless pubic mound and the correlation to prepubescent female children....