Trying to stay the course!
Trying to stick with it!!!
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Date: 7/21/2006 2:10:08 PM ( 11 y ) ... viewed 1837 times
Hey, well I decided to wait until tomorrow or the next day to do the master cleanse. I've actually decided to break the fast for just one or two days for the simple fact that I cannot go to the bathroom! I am going to go and get some watermelon and drink lots of prune juice and apple juice to help get things moving. I think I should have made sure things were moving before I started the fast. I went on a junk food binge the few days prior to my beginning the fast, so I guess the stuff is hanging on for dear life. And as disgusted as I am, I am going to go and buy an enema bag and try it. I'm still too scared to go and do a colonic, but I'm pretty desperate right now.
I'm also pretty stressed. I think my family and I are going to be moving soon. We are in the middle of bankruptcy and even though we had decided to keep our house, our mortgage company isn't being very nice, charging us all kinds of fees in order to stay and it isn't worth it. Plus the house has been literally falling apart the last couple of years and my hubby just doesn't have the time to work on it. He is a workaholic, and is often gone over 24 hours by choice. Plus it is extremely depressing to look at all of this broken stuff and having no energy or know how to fix it. I won't let company come in at all, we havn't had anyone over in the last year.
I guess it will be nice to rent a nice duplex or something and then I can make some friends that I won't be ashamed to let come over. Our house was beautiful when we bought it, so my pride is hurt and I am ashamed of myself for letting it get into this shape. Hopefully renting will prove to be less stressful, it just seems as though we are moving backwards though, and it doesn't help that my husband isn't happy about having to move, all he does is complain. He doesn't believe in chronic fatigue or any of my other health problems and he is already threatening me that I better not let our next house 'get like this', even though he has never lifted a finger to help. He hasn't cleaned the gutters in 4 years! I don't mean to make my hubby out to be an a-hole, he's just set in his beliefs and thinks that it's all in my head. He knows the way I used to be and he misses it. I mean, I had a cheerleading scholarship to college for goodness sakes! I used to be so energetic.
Sorry, it just feels good to vent. I don't really have anyone to talk to that understands. I will stay positive and you all do the same!!
Love and God Bless,
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